I’m FINE…

I have had a wonderful spring, and I do mean wonderful. In April, When a Duchess Says I Do launched quite nicely. I wasn’t sure how Duncan’s understated charm or Matilda’s damsel-in-check would go over with the readers, but no worries! In May, I published A Lady of True Distinction, another duke-free HEA that the readers seem to be enjoying. This month, Theresa Romain and I teamed up for the novella duet, How to Ruin a Duke, and it’s off to a great start.

But wait, there’s more! I was privileged to attend the 2019 Festival du Roman Feminim in Paris at the end of May. I added a couple days onto the front of that trip for jet lag, a couple onto the back because PARIS, and had a great time.

On June 8, about a week after I got home, I joined the Virginia Romance Writers in Richmond to give the keynote speech at their annual award luncheon–what fun!–and then it was on to the Historical Novelists Society of North American for their annual… oops.

Wait a minute. I got it into my head that the HNS meeting was the weekend of June 15-16, but it was actually the weekend of June 22-23. When on Thursday of the wrong, earlier week, I woke up and realized I did not have to tool down the interstate to play in DC’s beltway traffic, did not have to rush off to impersonate an extrovert again, did not EVEN have to put on my comfy-but-professional conference get ups… I about cried.

I was SO relieved to have a weekend at home with my cats. I slept in, I wrote stuff, I wore my play clothes, I might even have done some housework, (but let’s not get carried away). I thought I was having a good time, hitting my wickets, balancing travel and home, work and leisure, but I was way off.

I have known for maybe ten years that I’m not as physically resilient as I once was, but with less difference between my peak performance and my valley performance, it’s easier to convince myself, “I’m fine” when in fact, I’m bushed. I’m knackered and I need solitude, rest, and unstructured time to get back on track.

I think some of the reason I overshot my capacity is because I am not working a day job anymore. I still put in long hours, but I’m at home, and that doesn’t “feel” as much like exertion–but it is, especially mentally. Another factor is that I’m no longer plagued by a menstrual cycle (thanks be to the Almighty Powers for that). When I was younger, I had to keep an eye on the calendar and plan, however subconsciously, for bodily realities. Now, I tend to hydroplane when it comes to monitoring my mood and energy.

So I’m looking around for different trail signs than the ones I used to rely on to tell me when I’m approaching my activity limits. One is that the house gets unkempt. I’m no kinda housekeeper, but when my schedule is relaxed and I have enough energy, I do tidy up the nest. Another is my joie de plume. If I’m eager to open up the Work in Progress, I’m probably in a good place.

If I’m mixing up my dates, going for weeks without downtime, that’s probably not such a good idea. How do you tell when you’re approaching overload? To one commenter, I’ll send a print ARC of Forever and a Duke!

 

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

68 comments on “I’m FINE…

  1. 1
    Teenie Marie says:

    My signals are much like yours–forgetting stuff (like dates) I normally remember, letting laundry pile up without folding(clean laundry in the laundry-room ’cause I always DO IT but it’s in baskets–hubby can dig around for his clean underwear if he needs to:) ), not feeling like making *real meals* (lots of grilled cheese and BLTs but at LEAST not frozen stuff) and a sense of panic that never leaves. I don’t sleep well even if I’m EXHAUSTED, which means I’m more EXHAUSTED the next day and so on and so on…..and so on.

    This feeling often occurs toward the end of a rehearsal/concert cycle, but not always. There is a certain rhythm in my life during those times; writing my column for ChoralNet, my lesson, study and preparation and rehearsal, teaching lessons, meeting and attending a concert, then repeat. If something happens to disrupt or add to or change that rhythm significantly, that’s when the wack-a-doodle stuff occurs. It should be said, my domestic life can add to the wack-a-doodleness if there is some repair or workman etc. I must make time for or change things when things are hectic to begin with.

    I know I need calmness, time to drink my coffee every morning without conversation for at least 30 minutes, time to tidy up the kitchen before bed and enough time to get accomplished what needs to be accomplished, within reason, every day. And seven, preferably eight hours, of sleep every night. If I am busy and can DO those things, I’m fine. If not, I’m not fine. Knowing what you need to be fine is key. 🙂

    • 1.1

      One of my sisters went through an Extremely Busy Period while working full time and doing grad school. She found that getting up before everybody else was necessary for the common weal. If she didn’t have those morning minutes of peace and quiet, time to day dream, mind-wander, and sip coffee, her whole day went widdershins.

      I don’t like to rush out of the house first thing either. Not even to go to the horse barn. My engines rev gradually if they are to run smoothly.

  2. 2
    Brenda UK says:

    Generally my health and well being seem to trot along at a steady pace and without to many trips.I am in my early seventies so I have realised I can easily fall into the trap of overload,over planning,over doing it,taking to much on and then come crashing down on my backside.I try to please everyone and end up letting people down.Not good,so I am more aware that I must think and assess what I choose to take on and allow time for the unexpected things that crop up.If you are already on overdrive your capabilities to cope are compromised.Sometimes messing things up.I have certainly got myself into a pickle because of this.I have to remind myself I am retired and God gave me voice and I can say NO!!!.We your fans sometimes put pressure on you to keep your great books coming fast and furious,don’t let us do this to you.We can wait.We must,good writers are golden and need to be respected.Don’t box yourself in enjoy it all including “ME TIME”for yourself.

    • 2.1

      One of my brothers put it to me this way: You can survive a blowout going 90 miles an hour–but not if you’re driving with one finger on the wheel. He was right (don’t tell him I said that).

  3. 3
    Marianne says:

    You do come up with the best questions! And, Teenie Marie, I had to laugh about the grilled cheese. Between tortillas you can call them quesadillas.

    I used to keep a thick HEA for “that time of the month.” Now I get hit with a migraine of sorts, if I’ve overdone. I get the aura which makes me nauseated as well as unfocused and which may not give me my total vision back for a couple of days. Or if I push it, will hit me again.

    If I push physically, I overheat. Doing too much with my hands robs them of their strength and dexterity… sometimes the cheese sandwich is because I can’t hold a fork.

    And, yes, Duncan & Matilda were a bit of a stretch for me.

    • 3.1

      I used to have frequent migraines. Three days, sometimes a day off, then back on the other side. The meds were useless, so I eventually became hyper-vigilant about the triggers. As you note–over-exertion, particularly in summer. Getting short of sleep, hydration, quiet, or nutrition. Sometimes allergies would get me started… I had to PAY ATTENTION to my body and yikes, that was a years-long learning process.

      The headaches eventually faded, maybe because the stress faded, maybe because hardening of the arteries has started working its dubious magic. Whatever the reason, I am eternally grateful that a headache has become a rarity.

      You people are making my hungry for a grilled cheese sammich.

  4. 4
    Bonnie says:

    I can always tell when I’m reaching overload when I start making mistakes. If it’s physical overload, I start to get clumsy. If it’s mental overload, I start to get forgetful, and, regrettably, stupid.

    • 4.1

      My mom used to say, “When I get anxious, I get stupid.” We ALL do. I forget which author I was reading recently, and a bride on her wedding day (to the wrong guy) kept dropping things. I thought, “How many readers are going, “Yup… I know exactly what that’s like?” It was a great metaphor and sure did resonate with me.

  5. 5
    Margaret says:

    Ha! So many of us thanking the almighty powers that be for the monthly respite included in aging! I get a sore throat or a scratchy underarm when I’m beginning to drown. (Obviously, one is easier to deal with in public than the other!!). I suck on a zinc lozenge or search for the cortisone cream, and then try to arrange my schedule so I can get a good night’s sleep. And sometimes I find myself reading or listening to a string of “important” books that I truly value, but I realize my mind and heart need a break and it’s time for a quick dip back into romance. Thank you, Grace, for always being there during those moments!

    • 5.1

      You are welcome, Margaret. The writing works the same way for me. Real life can be challenging, but a good HEA is an antidote to every hard day. I’m reading Churchill’s biography now, and World War II has been hanging over the first 400 pages of the book, like a Zombie Apocalypse. Sometimes, I just have to read something else.
      And fortunately, there’s Mary Balogh, CS Harris, Eloisa James… Whew!

  6. 6
    Carol Wagner says:

    Clear signs I have exceeded: curling iron burns on any part of my person; not writing in my journal because my hands won’t produce legibly; dinner is breakfast-toast and jam, a boiled egg; unusual clumsiness; increased ibuprofen intake. When any or all of these appear, I know it’s time to throttle back take a deep breath and pause for a bit. Fortunately, at 73, I still recover fairly quickly, but I suspect that will change with time. At this point my solution is to try to become more observant of myself-practice prevention rather than cure.

    • 6.1

      Dinner is breakfast… Breakfast is my favorite meal. I wonder if we flip the menu because we like breakfast food the best?

      You mention curling iron burns, and I think for me there’s a tendency to bruise more when I’m going too fast. I walk into things, clip the corner of the table as I go by, close the car door and bang it on my knee… I hadn’t thought of that, but you are onto something.

  7. 7
    jeannette R halpin says:

    When I am tired, overloaded, upset, too hot, I do stupid things. Yesterday I put a brand new can of coffee, just purchased, in the trash can. Why? I have no idea. Fortunately I did discover it but… really? I also drop things and break things and trip over my own feet. I have to simply STOP and breathe and go to bed with the quilt over my head and withdraw for a while. I turn 70 in a week and I can tell that while I am still fine, thank you very much, I do have more of a tendency to brood on things and it’s harder to get myself out of that 4 am loop of worry. Sigh. I am trying to remember that worry will not add one cubit to my life, but it’s such a long term characteristic that it’s difficult.

    • 7.1

      People who worry (reasonably) tend to take better care of themselves, so you might well be adding a cubit or two to your days upon this earth.

      I have what I call Release Day Brain, on the day a new book comes out. That’s when I might tell you “Oh, yes, I got a nice 1500 word scene done this morning, and now I’m off to do my steps at the park, and I’ll pick up groceries on the way home…” Sounds good, but I saved that scene under some file name I will never remember, the farmer’s market is in the park every Tuesday creating a mob scene, and it’s kinda hard to get groceries when you leave your purse at home…

      EVERY release day, no matter how many books I put out.

  8. 8
    Beth Lisk says:

    I know I’m getting to THAT point when I keep feeling bad about myself and feel like bursting into tears about anything. My body starts telling me I’m at the edge of getting sick, too.

    • 8.1

      I get chapped lips. For years, I associated that symptom with an on-coming cold, but I realize lately that it’s also a stress-gauge. Nobody gets chapped lips in June… but I did.

  9. 9
    Susan Gorman says:

    I get tired – t I r e d -before I realize that I am overwhelmed. Can’t get enough sleep & I make poor food choices.

    I try to right my self- get away from my desk and walk the work parking lot, get up 30 minutes earlier & sit with Beanie and Rose on the deck with my coffee & of course I make my list!

    I was in charge of my dog clubs dues renewal, RSVP ( dinners, grooming spaces catalog) and Ways and Means this year— definitely overload. The house got neglected, no “good” dinners were cooked and the dogs looked like hairy beasts. Came home exhausted/— it took me 3 days to get my energy back

    I need to say no- firmly. Have made plans to streamline some of our clubs procedures and will resign from at least one Committee.

    • 9.1

      Oh, you make a good point. When I’m craving carbs, something is out of whack. I mean, who doesn’t like a good bagel and cream cheese, but when I can’t just finish the bagel and be about my business… When I think those awful store-bakery cupcakes qualify as food?
      Poor food choices, you are exactly right.

  10. 10
    Make Kay says:

    When I start getting SUPER short on patience, then I realize I’m overwhelmed. I’m not the most patient person to begin with, but being overscheduled is not nearly as easy for me as it used to be. Perhaps I am less tolerant of allowing it to happen? I’m trying to be better about setting boundaries.

  11. 11
    Lynn B says:

    My body starts to shut down when I am nearing burnout.I get more aches and pains, usually my lower back goes out, my knees hurt and I have to restrict activity. This makes it even worse as I too can no longer bounce back like I used to.I am also in the initial stages of retirement and I have not yet decided how I plan to define that.I want to pack in as much as I can for as long as I can but I want to take long walks along the ocean with my husband in addition to travel. Unfortunately we do not live near an ocean so wherever we move will be long distance. I think the best cure for burn out is to step back and analyze the situation but to keep moving the body.

    • 11.1

      I read your comment, and I thought, “Erm, persistent right shoulder bursitis?” It just would not go away, and my reaction was, “Aging stinks…” but once I considered a different hypothesis, “Overload stinks…” I realized I’d been missing my joint supplements, and they make a HUGE difference for me in the aches and pains department. I hadn’t taken the time to ice my shoulder, I hadn’t done the over the counter anti-inflammatories…
      I’d gotten into what I call weed whacker mode. Some people put on the goggles and headphones, fire up that thing, get their head down, and they are off in a different reality. They will whack until the gas tank is empty, whether there are weeds or not.
      That’s me on overload.

  12. 12
    traci says:

    I am an organizing type of person. So I keep a pocket sized calendar that I write everything in. Then I have a constant list of things that I need to accomplish. (Even my grocery list gets added too!). When my calendar starts to look full or my list gets longer than normal, I know it’s time to slow down!! LOL

    • 12.1

      That’s a good visual–a literally FULL calendar. When I get too busy, I am “too busy” to jot a note on the calendar. Subconscious rebellion, much?

  13. 13
    Sarah says:

    At the end of the evening if I stay up too late reading I know I am not getting enough quiet alone time to unwind in the day. So if I have over-scheduled it starts a slow descent into sleep deprivation that makes everything worse. Then it is lower and lower functioning until I am exhausted and force myself to shift things around to clear up time for myself during the day.

    • 13.1

      I spent many years “rewarding” myself with “an hour” of reading at the end of the day, but if it was a good book, the reward backfired a LOT. But it’s not too much ask it, is it? A little reading time at the end of the day?

  14. 14
    Beth says:

    Calendar time – you have to schedule down time and block it out on your calendar so you don’t go 24/7. Your body and brain needs sleep in days, reading time, cooking/healthy food acquisition time, and playing with the cats time.

    I took a leaf from my departed elders and got into a routine with days for activities. Friday is sheet changing/laundry. Monday is shopping (grocery deals locally). Don’t have to think about it, time is blocked out on my calendar, brain is freed for other activities and body gets some out of the house movement time.

    • 14.1

      I use my horseback riding lessons that way. They get me out of the house and driving past the bank, grocery stores, co-op, and so forth. Probably no words written those days, but the errands are done which means the writing days are absolutely, entirely, wonderfully for writing.

  15. 15
    Glenda M says:

    Glad you were able to get a weekend break, Grace! I’m an introvert who works retail. If I go too many days without getting ‘no people’ time – at least for an hour or 2 after work and before bed, I start getting very short tempered with everyone. This is a dead giveaway that I need a people break.

    • 15.1

      Retail is so HARD. I recall the sales people who could put up with me, though, the ones who got, “Don’t touch me, don’t bother me in the dressing room, don’t call me sweetie…” I would be nakey-nakey but for those women. I can well imagine they go home, close the door, pour a glass of wine, and thank the merciful powers for solitude.
      Hats off to you for doing that job. You will never be replaced by a machine, and your reward should be sainthood.

  16. 16
    Betsy Lewis-Bowie says:

    I’m not as nice as you are… I get forgetful.. but I also tend to get irritable. When I start snapping at people then I know that it’s time to sit down and figure out what I can cut or reschedule. As a total introvert, it means eating what’s in the pantry and using the shopping time to read a book. I’ve been really busy this summer so buying a lot of novellas because I haven’t had time to read a whole book.

    Just finished Dukes by the Dozen. It was fun and gave me some much needed breaks. My daughter’s drivers education class ends this week. I can’t wait to spend an entire day without leaving the house.

    • 16.1

      What IS it with us? The longer the car sits in the driveway at one go, the happier I am, as if no leaving the property is some sort of brass ring. For me, it is. I’ve never reached the point where I find myself thinking, “I am sick of staring at these walls, I’m going to Mall!”
      Not ever.

  17. 17
    Mary DeGrow says:

    Dear Grace
    First let me say how much I enjoy your books, all your books. I discovered you just after you started publishing and I savour them, and go back to them when I’m feeling stressed or have read 1 too many dark and/or twisted mystery/fantasy/science fiction. I don’t read “improving “ or socially relevant books, it’s too late for that even if I were interested. I buy you books if I can’t get them at the library and thenI wait until I can’t wait any more to read them. Delayed gratification or what.
    On the subject of approaching overload. I know when it gets close because I start fragmenting. My mind starts darting back and forth, I start something and get distracted onto something else, And making lists. Those are fine for travel prep but for everyday?And the vague feeling of panic. I don’t panic easily.
    Usually this happens when I have taken on too much work or am paying too much attention to other people’s deadlines. And those are the ones usually don’t show to collected the completed project and forgot their cheque book. I restore works of art and am a troglodyte…working away in my basement studio.
    When I start saying”how important is it.” and on a scale of 1 to 10 where 10 is life threatening and 1 is Do I give a………? I know I have to step back and be unavailable for a while. And at 70 I am finally trying to work 2 days a week but self employment is what it is. And travelling, if I’m not here I’m not working. It’s an odd exit strategy but it is successful to a degree. But with clients of 40 years, it’s hard to say no.
    Anyway, I hoarding A lady of distinction for the next self indulgent moment and looking forward to Forever and. Duke when it comes out.
    Thank you for all the pleasure you have given me and so many others.
    Mary
    PS Writing this is a first for me.

    • 17.1

      What a cool job! I can see a mystery series with the art restoration expert who is always “trying to retire,” but she keeps her hand in, and what she knows about art, about the restoration technical process, about people, ends up solving the caper every time… And she travels too, meaning the series has all sorts of exotic locales. Do you feel a story coming on?

      I’m glad you are enjoying the books, because I have a great time writing them. I’m not much of a list maker, but when I do (cue the meme) I often lose the list in my purse.

  18. 18
    Doreen Knight says:

    I know I’m burning out when my usual optimism fails me. When small things upset me more than they should. When I look at my calendar and there’s something down for every day, and I just want a day with no obligations. When I start feeling as if I’m old.

    • 18.1

      “When I start feeling as if I’m old…” Wow, Doreen. That’s it in a nutshell. And for me feeling old does come with a side of pessimism and sense of creative defeat. No place I want to spend much time!

  19. 19
    Nancy Byrne says:

    I’m retired, so overload is something I avoid at this point in my life. I do have to have my mental getaways, however. These include planning travel, and reading. I’ve even planned travel so that I can just read. For instance, I have a trip coming up that is in the Berkshires, and although I am going to get out to a musical (Shrek the Musical) and a Beethoven concert at Tanglewood, the rest of the week will be spent reading.The best part of this trip is that I only have to drive a couple hours away. I may take a day to go to Saratoga Springs for a race or two and to look at the pretty horses, but still up in the air on that. I don’t like to think about cleaning much, because we wish to put our home of 35 years on the market in the spring, and 35 years of stuff is daunting. Overload this coming winter is definitely looming. I will force myself to go to the gym, eat healthy, and pray a lot! And then, of course, I have your books to look forward to! Always praying for more Grace!

    • 19.1

      More on the way, I promise!
      What a cool idea, to get just far enough away that it’s a change of scene, not a huge logistical effort to get there. I drove through the Berkshires a few years ago, and thought, “Moving to MA might not be such a bad idea…” But the winters can serious business, more of hassle than Maryland’s summers.
      I’ve run into many people who claim they are busier in retirement than they ever were “before,” and they always seem happy to report this.

  20. 20
    charlene capodice says:

    I get forgetful and anxious also at times get dizzy, so I know it is time to rest!! Ha Ha if only! I have cut down to cleaning 1 room and day it’s all I can do without being exhausted! I guess it is because I am 68 not 21! Thanks for a great article and for a chance to win!

  21. 21
    Teresa says:

    I too lose my words and my appetite, both which bother me greatly. In an aside about your chapped lips-stress can increase your need for B vitamins and zinc and that can show up as chapped lips or cracks in the corners of your lips

  22. 22
    Margot Purcell says:

    Since retiring fully I find there is no need to be as calendar conscious as when I was working. Then I had many more deadlines and had to know what day it was when waking. I do still keep a calendar but it only shows when certain bills need to be paid, if I have an appointment, if I am to meet someone, or a few other connecting reminders.
    I also am a recent widow so it is my cat and I in the home so why clean so often. I do this only when expecting company and that is enough. Having been in the medical field I cringe now when doctors want to know if I know what day it is or how old I am as those things long have lost their need to be known on a daily basis. I now understand the hesitation when older folks are asked questions – who is the President, what is today’s date, what did you have to eat yesterday etc.
    I enjoy each day as it comes and enjoy meeting with friends and family. I now have time to be lazy, to read, to take walks, and just do nothing for a moment or two.

  23. 23
    Samantha Niemeyer says:

    Honestly, this is somewhat easier (but possibly more annoying) for me. I have MS (23 years and counting) so when I’m stressed or overwhelmed, I tend to switch the B and V sounds. Like volleyball becomes bollyvall. It comes out of the blue; you’d be surprised how many times I’ve sounded like I was channeling Dracula or a random Russian. But it’s a big red flag to take a day and do nothing. I’m not terribly good at ignoring things that need done, so I have to stay in my bedroom with a book (sometimes yours) and forget the world exists. But I do make it a point to schedule one day off from work a month and relax. Keeps me from being too overwhelmed too often.

  24. 24
    Sarah Partain says:

    When I’m over tired or stressed, I have horrible sleep and these mysterious bruises show up at my extremities. I currently look like I’ve been beat up by a genie.

  25. 25
    Linda McVicker says:

    When I realise I have a book going in every room of my house so I can read where ever I am, then I step back and ask myself why. I then come to the conclusion that I am on overload and reading constantly. I look around and see that I have not finished anything.

    I have to put all the books down and take a mental break. Then I have to make a list. I love crossing things off a list! Soon I am back on track and just reading the one book with my list empty fo another day.

    Life gets messy and complicated and I don’t feel guilty either way. Being on chemo for breast cancer makes you sit back and realise that nothing is important but yourself and your own health.

  26. 26
    Candace N says:

    I have 4 kids aged 5, 7, 9 and 11 so things do get a bit hectic but I’m accustomed to it now. That’s not to say I don’t get stressed when I have to be in 3 places at once and I don’t have a license . I am a stay at home mom though so I am not as overloaded as I could be. If I’m not managing well the pressure to do everything isn’t there and I can just widdle down what isn’t important or dire and try again later.

  27. 27
    Julie L Spurlin-Hane says:

    I get really short tempered – usually at my poor husband. Or I get a headachethat keeps me from doing much.

  28. 28
    Monique Flasch says:

    When I come home from work and just want to sleep immediately. And still can sleep at night…then I know it is bad.

  29. 29
    Lisa Hutson says:

    I noticed that you said you have quit having periods, so that helps with your timeline. But that means menopause will bring across other changes that you have to be aware of.
    My indicators are pretty simple ones. Probably the same as most anybody. I’m more tired than usual. Maybe I eat more chocolate than usual. I just feel done in all the time. Headaches are very rare for me. But if I have one that’s a good indicator.

  30. 30
    Jennifer Orr says:

    When I look at the calendar and feel overwhelmed with all the stuff going on and trying to figure how to get all the regular stuff done – like work and chore and dinner. Spring and Summer seem to amp the sense of out of control. During the school year, the schedule has a pattern we settle into that doesn’t vary very much. But once my kid’s hockey season ends, it seems like whatever free time we should have disappears too fast.

  31. 31
    Irina says:

    Looking around, I can tell you that obviously, my household lacks when I feel overwhelmed,exhausted and at my limit. I tend to mess up dates and forget a lot of things. When things get really, really rough, I might even have a problem finding words and forming phrases (which is rather terrifying as I’m a translator not working as such at the moment but still…).

  32. 32
    Pat Miller says:

    I’ve already pre-ordered my copy Grace, so I’ll leave the opportunity for someone else to benefit from your generosity. Keep those books coming!!

  33. 33
    Sara says:

    When I still feel exhausted after a good night’s sleep, I know I need to cut back my activities.

  34. 34
    Linda K Stults says:

    My hands start shaking when I over do. Thanks for the chance!

  35. 35
    Laura Canciamilla says:

    For me, my arrival at the junction of overload and shutdown has always been accompanied by a growing sense of both angst and wavering belief in my own ability to get things done. There is an accompanying wave of analysis paralysis and a need to be perfect or be invisible. The only way I get through it is to take one thing and do it….after many deep breaths and much self talk to counter my internal voice….which too often is negative.

  36. 36
    Molly Kate McGinn says:

    The first thing I notice is the collection of small burns and tiny knife nicks that start showing up when I’m just making ordinary meals for myself. Next, I drop things. Then clothes I toss at the laundry basket fall back out because it’s FULL. Time to pull back!

  37. 37

    When I become over stressed my eye sight fails me. Things become blurry even while wearing glasses.

  38. 38
    Maribeth Curry says:

    My fibro flares and pain, insomnia, moodiness etc raise their VERY ugly heads till I slow down and let my body catch up to all that the rest of me wants to do – I get a lot of reading of favourite authors done during that time tho :`)

  39. 39
    Jo Payne-Pierce says:

    I can tell I’m doing too much or have over-extended myself when I get weepy…It is a terrible feeling to just totally hit the wall emotionally and physically. The way I get myself back to where I need and want to be is to start reading more. I don’t understand why people don’t read.

  40. 40
    Denise says:

    I stop doing the dishes, stop dreaming in colors. Sounds strange but I enjoy hand washing the dishes early in the morning. The dreaming in colors, I create beaded jewelry, sun catchers… all of the above I would do while listening to a book.
    Work has been stressful for me and my son is struggling with school and depression and then I broke my arm the last day of March (missed the sign to slow down and take care of myself?). And just like that all the things I enjoy doing was limited to looking but not participating, no dishes, no beading, no gardening for 10 weeks and the slowly gaining use of my arm and the swelling in my hand is going down and strength is coming back.

  41. 41
    KY says:

    When I’m overloaded, exercise really helps. It’s almost like a contradiction. I have no time for exercise, but that half an hour would make a huge difference in mood and sleep.

  42. 42

    I am sorry you were drained. I am also sorry I didn’t see
    I at HNS. How did that happen?! When I hit a wall I either drop deeply asleep or can’t sleep- or a mixture. The latter two are frustrating! And, yes, my sorta housekeeping becomes nigh on nonexistent! I hope you are feeling better.

  43. 43
    Ghazal Mansoor says:

    I know I am close to iverload when my head feels like its being smashed with a hammer and my hands begin to swell up. At that time,I need to make some coffee, sit down, and massgae my hands. Worse case scenario, meds work for the headache from the overload.

  44. 44
    Terri Edeen says:

    I was wondering why I would drop things and slur my words. Feeling clumsy. Now it all makes sense. I worked alot of hours the last 6 years with not much time off. More stressed when my store closed.

  45. 45
    Amy says:

    When I begin to fantasize about being home and doing chores there, I know how need some down time. Sometimes I’ll take a day off work to knock out said chores and that gives me margin to read, relax and hang out with my family.

  46. 46
    Michelle Huneycutt Johnson says:

    My daughter who is 21 and is working student services, and I were talking about decision fatigue(df). For me df also goes along with my bodies rebellion into total exhaustion. Tells that I am teaching a limit are1) I get chatty seriously a am a chatter box. It is like my body is working overtime to stay awake. 2) I forget to take my medicine. I am diabetic so this a really big deal. Or I take my medicine and forget to eat. 3) I too get dates mixed up. I went to a party yesterday that is tonight. And last 4) my cat snuggles more. When I have worn myself out mentally and physically and am on the brink of getting sick my cat become less aloof. She meows a lot snuggles/ spoons with me. Someday she mirrors me in her stretched out pose.

  47. 47
    flchen1 says:

    I get irrationally cranky about seemingly minor issues, alas… it’s not a good look 😉 Hope everything is going well, Grace!

  48. 48
    Deborah Anderson says:

    I feel you. Working from home presents its own challenges (forgetting the off-switch, is one). Travel is exhausting, too. And the older we get, the less patience we have for some of it. We just did three-days in Toronto and the 3hr time change threw me right off. I slept twelve hours our first night there. I never sleep twelve hours. Half the time I’m lucky to sleep six.

    I always know I’m approaching overload when insomnia and irritability kicks in. Or I’m raiding the fridge. Managing stress is critical too good health and good sleep. Good sleep is critical to managing stress. Vicious cycle. 😉