I know some things about myself.
For example, I enjoy public speaking, but I don’t enjoy being in a crowd. The idea of cramming myself into a space with tens of thousands of other people–your basic college football game or rock concert–is a hard no for me. I’d manage well enough, but the experience would take a toll in lingering anxiety, broken sleep, scattered focus, and low mood.
The same symptoms befall me when I can’t have fairly consistent slow mornings. For me that means I don’t have to be anywhere before about 1 pm. I can have solitude and unstructured time before noon. My morning might be busy–plant the dahlias, write 2500 words, run three loads of wash, tote up last month’s sales, and so forth–but how I get all the things done is up to me, and I’m not interrupted as I putter from flowerbeds to laundry room to writing desk.
I worry that when a neighbor does drop by unannounced, my body language and micro-expressions are all telegraphing, “Please go away now.” In the usual case, I can roll with 
the distractions, have a nice chat, and get back to my pothering, but if I plan poorly, and schedule myself five or six days out of seven tearing around to appointments, errands, and obligations, I pay for it.
I know social connections are good for us emotionally and cognitively, and I know being able to control even half the day is a great privilege. For me, it has also become a necessity. If I don’t write first thing in the day (after pet chores), then the writing rarely happens, and if it does happen later, it’s more of an effort and less of a frolic.
What absolutely kicks me in that pants though, is how many decades I lived without control over my schedule, from little up. Some of that was me overbooking myself, but a lot of it was simply the need to pay bills and parent. Now that I can have many days on my ideal terms, I treasure the impact on my life. I’m happier, more productive, better 
rested, less anxious, and not as grumpy (most of the time).
What do you finally have on your own terms? What happens if you don’t get it? What still thwarts your progress toward ideal days?
PS: The Dreadful Duke is in the house! (Meaning His Grace is now on sale at the major retail sites. Ordering links here. Also, Lord Julian’s first audio book, A Gentleman Fallen on Hard Times, is now available through the web store.
I set my alarm for 6:30 am to have time to myself in the morning. That is the one piece of the day that’s mine. I get up and take care of the dogs, make coffee and eat breakfast and have time to myself. Most of the time I read .
I have to log in at 8:30 for work and log out at 5:30…so most of my day is planned. I run a couple of errands on Saturday and take it easy with chores around the house.
Sunday is dog class day which is my favorite day of the week, I see friends, learn and spend time with my dogs.
I am hoping to retire in 3 years . Would love to garden and raise a puppy and walk the beach…small goals. It will be nice to have to unscheduled time. Time for myself.
I am happily retired and the best thing about that is I (mostly) get to decide how I spend my time. So my mornings, like yours, are for me and me only. It takes me a while to really wake up and be at my best intellectually and emotionally. I was never a morning person and even though I do get up at 9am these days, part of me wishes I could throw my alarm clock away. However, I have read many studies that a consistent sleep routine is essential for good health and that’s about my biggest concern these days so I go to bed about midnight and get up at 9. I schedule as many appointments after lunch as possible, but some of my doctors are not providing afternoon appointments anymore. If I have to go by somebody else’s schedule, it does make me cranky. But I remember it’s temporary (so far) and I can get by. I do try to schedule no more than 1 medical appointment per week though it’s not always possible.
The calendar program on my desktop shows me the upcoming schedule for the next 7 days and my favorite time is when I turn it over on Sunday and see nothing scheduled for the week! (And it’s nice enough to put up a banner confirming that in case I missed it.)
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Oh my goodness! I could have written this one myself! I love controlling my own schedule, no longer having to get up at 6:30 to go to work and do loan documents!! I might get up at 6:30 anyway, but it’s my decision if I do, when the birds are singing and the coffee is perking. I almost never do anything in the outside world until noon or 1 PM, and then I start my errands and chores, go to the gym, etc. I tutor someone in the evenings twice a week, so I am still productive but not in the early morning. It’s lovely, AND I can also stay up until midnight finishing The Dreadful Duke without feeling like I will be a rag in the morning at the office. I started work at 16 and worked for 50 years, so I deserve this lovely leisurely time. Hurray!
I am going to retire in a few months, after 42 years. I plan on sleeping until I wake up – no more setting my phone to wake me up except for special events. I would like to read as much as I want to. Will enjoy doing more puzzles, crosswords, etc.
I’m going to enjoy being free to do what I want to do. It will be blissful. I also will see if I can get a long delayed knee replacement. :fingers crossed:
Yes, that’s me, as well. Even when I was teaching in the classroom, I’d wake up early (without an alarm) and have a big mug of coffee in bed before rushing off to school. Now that I’m retired, it’s cocoa that I start my morning off with and spend one or two hours reading in bed – delightful. If I have to rush in the morning, I feel discombobulated all day.
Since I am (mostly) retired now, I can set my own schedule. The occasional graphic design work that I still do for a local nonprofit can be done on my terms. I prefer to get my work done in the morning, so my boss knows that if she sends me something late in the day, that it will wait until the next day. And now that neither my husband nor I have to punch a clock, we spend most mornings taking fitness classes or playing pickleball. I find the activity invigorates me and we really enjoy chatting with the friends we have made at the classes. When classes get cancelled I really miss both the exercise and the camaraderie. Stay safe. Stay well everyone!
How bugs feel: When I was about 5/6 my mom and stepdad bought my sister and I bikes for Easter. After church they were like “do you wanna learn how to ride them?” And I was like??? Duh?? I had finally gotten the hang of it and I was riding around the circle showing off, and my mom was like “say cheese” so I look over at her for a second and I FUCKING RAM INTO A CAR AT FULL SPEED. A parked car that I didn’t even see, like at all, so I just rammed into this car and I fell off my bike and I was crying and all I could think about was “this must be how bugs feel” like they’re flying around living life and then SPLAT. Looking back that was my first existential crisi. More stories here https://u.to/n2mkIA
I go to bed and get up when I want. I eat when and what I want. I read what and when I want.
It’s a year since my husband passed. I’m still in the process of establishing my routines, finding my rhythm.