You know it’s hot when…
The spring session at the therapeutic riding barn ended this week with a couple of very hot days. When that happens, we offer unmounted lessons, but many participants simply choose to stay home. The barn is not air conditioned, and neither people nor animals are acclimated to the heat yet.
I had some barn-related errands to run, so I decided to make the trip even though I wasn’t strictly needed on premises yesterday. Got in the car, cranked up the AC, tooled on over the mountain and across the valley. Such a pretty day, despite the heat.
And that attitude is not normal for me. Usually, when I drive that route, I am aware that it’s pretty countryside, but I’m also a little tense, fretting over the clock, over what I’ll teach, over the exertion of trudging around a hot (or cold) indoor arena for miles. I’m trying to make every excursion count, but days at the barn are long and tacking to-dos and errands on top of the outing can get to be too much.
I was stunned by what a different drive it was when I had nothing of any significance on my agenda. Just pretty country roads, the corn coming along (“knee high by the Fourth of July”), the winter wheat ready to come off, the alfalfa looking good… la-la-la-la…
Which led me to realize that my schedule this year has had no designated Sabbath. I don’t mean a dress up and go to church day (though that has value for many people, I know), I mean a day that reliably isn’t volunteering, authoring, house-wrangling, or to-doing. A day to sleep in, wear my play clothes, schedule nothing and nobody.
I know better. I know the writing improves for being regularly paused. That ideas need time to marinate, and that I’ve never done first rate work on a tight deadline. The notion that volunteering is a break from writing, and writing is nice quiet counterbalance to volunteering doesn’t hold as much water I’d anticipated.
A change is not as good as a rest. Hmm.
Without breaks, I get to hamster-wheeling, walking in the door and seeing all the chores I skipped to put in a long day in the riding arena. My commutes are full of blurb polishing, dramatic arc plotting, and lesson plan reviews. My writing is not the all absorbing joy I know it can be.
So this is me, cutting back at the barn to two days a week at least for summer. That was hard–they need the help, I am competent to provide it, it’s just for a couple months! But I did it, and somehow, the barn is still standing. I will again put the blog on hiatus for July (have great vacays, everybody!) This is also me, spending a day up at Deep Creek Lake with an old friend. We will just hang out and eat and drink slightly irresponsibly.
And I am trying on Take a Breather Tuesdays. Might have to shift that around some, but the reality is, if I don’t choose and indulge in a flaps down day, then I end up with days that “get away from me,” scenes I have to chuck or heavily re-write, and a commute spent fretting instead of appreciating nature’s glory.
Phooey on that. I’m going to impersonate me some lilies of the field. When and how do you Sabbath?
Since I am a total stay-at-home and only go out when I have to (medical appointments mostly), pretty much every day is unstructured. However, I caught my summer cold early (didn’t want to wait til the last minute you know) and have been doing even less for the last several days. I’m either freezing or sneezing or coughing my lungs out or going through boxes of tissues as if they were free (I’m on the second one now). And, I am tired of it! (I’m not a good sick person).
I didn’t quite understand if this is the last blog before your vacation, but, if so, hope it is as refreshing as you want and need!
Karen, get well soon! My mom thought I caught a cold every year as school started, then she figured the culprit was ragweed. I’m still figuring out culprits… and no, this is not quite the last post before I take July off. I have couple more to go in June and then I’ll lay low (in the AC) for July.
I do the “Sunday-Go-To-Meeting thing, but started taking a nap Sunday afternoons when the kids were small. Sometimes I rested to the sounds of piano practice, my husband dictating files, a cranky parrot and yappy dog, but the time was mine. I still nap Sunday afternoons.
My husband and I plan unstructured time together Saturday afternoons.
I sabbatical Tuesdays, if only because that’s when the pre-orders come in! These days that’s when the grocery order arrives, and I don’t have to think about what to make with what there is.
If there is nothing but time, however, I find I lose my appreciation for what is, begin to question time’s existence and become annoyed with the divine scheme all the way down to the neighbor’s construction crew. Perhaps it’s rather like where we found Lord Julian Caldicott at the beginning of Book One.
I had myself fooled with that unstructured time thing. I thought, “If I get to say what order I do my tasks in, that’s like a day half-off, right?” Except it isn’t. That’s like being busy, but organizing the to-dos somewhat on the fly.
You have touched a very sensitive point, Grace Ann. Lately time seems to fly by and I can’t even remember the last time I felt as not having “nothing of significance on my agenda”… what a fine phrase! I, too, know better. My body knows better. My mood knows better. I feel happier, lighter…Contrarily, recently time seems to be speeding up with a mind of its own…
…Ah, to be a “woman of leisure”…
I suspect that for me the habit of no real time off has some roots in anxiety, some in self-worth, and in some in cussed independence. When you run your own businesses, you really do need stay on top of things or they can snowball.
I cannot blame my parents. They RESTED, they played, they left it on the desk at 5 pm. Me… not so much.
But then, Mom and Dad had health care, retirement, paid sick leave and paid vacay, tenure, the time to develop a big circle of friends and to stay in touch with family… all of which can make downtime feel less like goofing off.
I’m in a Monday to Friday job, and have found that I can spend one weekend day on chores and shopping, or visiting family, but then I really need to keep the other weekend day as my day off, with nothing planned. I really need that time off for myself, to read, or putter about and nap, or do some sewing, and just relax. If I don’t get it, I’ll start the workweek off being already tired, and that doesn’t lead to good results.
Being retired I don’t have a schedule anymore. However I find myself at sixes and sevens, having just returned from a month in Texas. Ack! Schedule a haircut. Check all the plants. Do laundry. Get my car inspected. Get some bloodwork done. Get ready for a weekend trip to the beach to see the tall ships. I’m going nuts! Some of this will be postponed until after the beach. Haircut tomorrow!
Still trying to figure that one out- along with the whole retirement thing. Not having a set schedule and a purpose is actually feeling more stressful than work did! Lordy!
I’m truly retired (no part-time job) so ostensibly every day is the Sabbath with lots of frittering time. However, this month I’m working with an accountability partner to “gently push me” into getting my mounds of paperwork done.
Boy, am I ever reluctant to do it. I’m like a little kid having a tantrum on the flood, kicking my heels, and shouting, “You can’t make me,” but without the yelling.
I’d like to be finished by the end of the month because I’ve got other plans and goals. But as I sit at the table, staring at what needs to be done, I’m still playing on my laptop and reluctant to close the lid.
Step away from the computer, Carol! (Ha, ha.)
The trouble I find with unstructured time is that doing nothing breeds on itself. While it’s easy to fall into the pattern it does not feel good to get nothing done. I too find myself moving between one medical appointment and another.
On a happier note, not too long ago I was in an unusual place and needed the GPS to get me to my physical therapy appointment. As I followed directions through completely unfamiliar place I suddenly found myself driving through pristine unsullied desert for maybe 10 miles. I had forgotten how beautiful it is! I think my blood pressure dropped about 20 points. What a pleasure.
I’m retired and as I get older I’m finding I need one or more days each week with nothing scheduled. I still enjoy seeing friends and attending events but it’s so relaxing to have a day where I don’t *have* to watch the clock for any reason. It took a year or two to stop feeling like a lazy bum if I didn’t do anything constructive on a day but I treasure those days now.
Uh oh! I feel seen! Nolo contendere!
Left to myself, I will work til I drop. As noted when I made my first grocery run in TWO MONTHS! (Stuff happened)
When a Costco run feels like a vacation + I look in the mirror & see my granny because I’m months overdue for my hair angel to whack me back from Monty Python shrubbery status, it’s past time I take a few days off that don’t involve appointments, chore catchups, or repair bills.
Think I’ll have to ease into it a half day at a time so the generational guilt ladled on by the elders doesn’t overwhelm me. *Sigh*
Scheduled my hair whacking for Saturday. Plus my doc is aiding & abetting by insisting I drop by Friday for a B12 shot. Seems there are a few lab reasons why I’m feeling a tad run down.