I have been thinking lately about what I need to be happy. My perspective is not, “How little could you live on?” though that’s always an interesting question, but more, “If you had all the money in the world, but still didn’t have ___________, could you be as happy as you are now?” (I’m pretty happy in recent years.)
This is a thought experiment, and my conclusions might vary widely from reality, but I think if I could not have regular, lengthy, quiet times of solitude, I’d quickly grow miserable. My ideal companions are cats who sleep sixteen hours a day. Comforting presences without much noise or movement. Those stretches of hermiting are how I recover from stress, cope with new developments, germinate ideas, and ponder the big questions. I’d lose my balance and make dumb mistakes if I didn’t have my hermit time.
I need animals in my life. Cats work well, horses are a privilege. I love me a friendly dog, and the singing of birds just lifts my spirits. My property is also home to skunks, possums, raccoons (not my fave), and lots of small mammals plus the occasional shy snake. The neighborhood hosts a bear every few years, and white tail deer lurk in my hedgerow.
The sight of big trees, or greenery in general is a necessity that I take for granted until I’m out west, and homesick for verdure. My flower beds are a later-in-life joy that all the money in the world could not convince me to give up. Good books fall into the same category. My family, too, of course. I don’t see as much of them as I’d like, but they are with me in my heart, and I am with them.
I’m tempted to add the creature comforts–starting my day with the perfect cup of tea–but those come after the soul food. We are seeing more and more of the people who have all the money in the world, but when I look at those guys, I wonder, “Are you even happy, Mr. ManyBucks? You don’t look, sound, or act happy to me, and no part of me wants to be you or have your money.”
My wealth isn’t my money. I like having enough money to meet basic needs, and hope I always do, but my wealth is a healthy-enough body, loving family, and a life mostly on my terms with my modest comforts at hand.
What is your wealth?
My Wealth
My Family
Friends
A corgi to love and Pat
A soft blanket to keep warm
The ability to walk to the beach and see the waves and hear them crash.
And my books
My wealth matches yours pretty well. I am probably not as close to my family (for myriad reasons) but I do keep in touch with a couple of them. I need my reading (by the way, can you write faster? No pressure, of course.) The only other thing I really need is to figure out where I can move that the government and the neighbors aren’t too stupid or mean or loud, and (as I think I posted before) the weather gods aren’t out to get me. I really have to get my passport renewed soon, just in case. And part of my wealth is that I can actually do these things, as soon as I make a decision.
I think I would be desperately unhappy as a billionaire. They all seem so, don’t they?!
I’m struggling with some health upheaval right now so happiness feels like more of a stretch goal, but I am trying to settle on “peace in this moment right now”
I think I agree entirely with your last paragraph. I have 2 dogs who I would put in that blank at the beginning. I am currently trying to get rid of a great deal of stuff that has accumulated in my house. It’s not so much that I can’t part with it as much as I don’t want to fill up land fills with useful stuff. Then I avoid the sorting and play with my very patient loving dogs…
PS
Regarding billionaires, what I see is unbelievable selfishness. If I had a billion dollars I would follow Paul Newman’s advice “if people knew how much fun it is to give money away, they wouldn’t wait until they are dead to do it.”
I like Paul Newman’s comment, Sue! I would love to have an unlimited fund on which to draw. I have a design in my head for a super daycare, even know where I’d build it!
Enough to eat, enough to wear, a roof over my head that doesn’t leak, a dear husband, dog, couple of kids and enough extended family to feel as if I exist in time. A measure of faith God.
My mother passed on a tradition, and I have NO idea where she got it from, that we washed in money on New Year’s Eve. When trying to explain this tradition to my young children, one child’s takeaway was that we did this so we would become rich. When I tried to explain that the whole point was not wealth , but that we would have enough of what we needed in the New Year. While everyone has a different notion of enough, I love the concept. In reality, we really need very little to be happy. As you mentioned, health (this becomes more important as I get older!), our loved ones, a safe place to live and enjoy life, good friends, contentment.
My adult children still carry on and have passed on this tradition!
Happiness is having your family members be well, safe and secure. I just paid off my mortgage, which also makes me happy. As for pets (furry family members), I am awash in them but wouldn’t part with any of them.
Even though I am semi-retired, I still don’t have a lot of free time – I work 3 days a week, and those pets take a lot of time to keep provisioned.
I have been in procrastination mode for the last couple of weeks, and hope that I soon have the urge to tackle all the things I’ve let slide.
I agree that the billionaires do not look happy, and also agree with Paul Newman. If our generation’s robber barons would start funding education, museums, research, the arts, and work to address inequality, they’d feel better and I’d feel better (but they still wouldn’t get my data or kudos since they are part of the problem in the first place.)
I think for my personal ideas of happiness and wealth, I say the usual family, health, safety, but would also add community and solitude (toggle as needed), natural beauty, and peace.
That friend who will haul you to oh dark hundred surgeries & thinks you’re delightful when doped up.
A sunny porch where lavender is blooming itself crazy despite unseasonable weather & a tiny bud signals a rose waking. Rosemary overflowing & the basil dragged indoors last minute last fall decided to overwinter & play perennial.
A paid off roof overhead & paid off car for acquiring food, prescriptions & other necessities.
Sufficient clothing for warm in the cold & cool in the hot.
Enough food to remain well padded, even if it requires “depression era cooking” learned from the survivors of the Great one.
Books! Audio, ebook, & print. Feeding the soul has never been more important for my well being. Music likewise.
All this says I am rich beyond measure.
My wealth this week was looking back on an emotionally rough (at times somewhat traumatic) year and realizing that even though what happened grieves me still, the way I often (not always, but often) responded was more in line with the person I feel called to be. That is hope-bringing.
My wealth is my faith, my family of my husband and our pets, moments to be at peace, food, shelter, stories that remind me to have hope and to cherish the little wonders in life, and watching Brittney Griner dunk a basketball in a pro game for the first time since her return from being unjustly held hostage in Russia. That was a cool moment this week.
My wealth is financial security. Lots of books. A dog to dote on. Loving family. Good health. The ability to travel and enjoy it. Good friends.